MY Blerch

GoJane had a great post on Facebook today, something like 'If days were shoes, Mondays would be clogs.'  Ha!
Also great is this Bears game so far :)  Hey, we need the win.  (Update 45-28 F)

So I really feel like I left things kind of hasty yesterday.  I know it didn't seem like much, but it took me months to compose the first post.  Not due to content, obviously, but because of my anxiety.  Then I finally published, then waited, then realized I should probably take it down because it was so...short?  Partial?  I don't know.  Then with every notification I received, I became more and more anxious.  Comment notifications would make me the most nervous - what are you thinking, what did you say to me?  All the likes brought to light just how many people are out there, how many of you I'm friends with, and what beautiful people you are for being so supportive.  Thank you, it calms me some.  It's more than hard to bare all in words for the internet to see...

I'm sort of a runner.  When people ask me if I'm a runner I don't give an emphatic "YES" but the more I think about it, I suppose I am even though I'm by no means good at it.  I started running on a team in middle school and continued sprinting in high school.  I am a licensed IHSA official in Track and Field and for the past two summers I've been the head coach of the Rockford Fire Track and Field team.  When you get older there really aren't sprints to compete in.  On the contrary, 'distance' races have become trendy.  I don't like them for that reason - however - one of my resolutions was to complete a distance race in 2011.  Therefore the first distance race I ever completed was with Nancy (first shout out - yay!) and Jerry, and it was the Shamrock Shuffle 8k in downtown Chicago.  Side note - if you are considering a race for the first time I highly recommend running one downtown.  Fans are everywhere and I couldn't have made it without the entertainment many of them provided.  From the guy selling high-fives to the guy dressed JUST like Will Ferrell in the cowbell skit - it was amazing.

If you've never visited theoatmeal.com , then I'm a little glad because I get to show you something cool today and if you HAVE, then that's wonderful and you know what I mean but I'm still hoping you will be amused by what I'm going to share.  I came across this article a couple of months ago - right after I finished the Women Rock 10k in late September.  I felt very accomplished after this run (I don't say race because I'm not fast - I just want to finish alive), so accomplished that I knew I could have confidence and actually post a blog one day ;)  Before I continue, here is the comic:
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/running
It takes a little bit to finish, but I promise, as with everything on this site - it's worth it.  I was smitten by it, the genius, the humor, and in the end I had tears in my eyes.  It hits home.  He articulated everything so well, at least for me, but I think other runners or anyone pushing themselves physically would also agree.  Now, everything is not identical.  My blerch still represents "gluttony, apathy, and indifference".  I don't run ultra marathons like this guy does, nor do I run fast.  10k was my longest.  I wasn't a fat kid.  But the guts are still the same.  I run to make myself feel better about all the other horrible habits I have.  When I run I feel like it gives me a few freebies on what I eat and how little I might move.  It IS a magical shortcut to euphoria.  You DO defeat the Kracken.  Our lives are filled with so much.  Every day.  All day.  As I alluded to earlier, I am not only an analyst but I also have anxiety.  That often leads to non-stop brain.  I know a lot of you have similar situations.  We have concerns, plans, "fear, regret, doubt, cake"...

I encourage you to find your clarity.  And realize that it might be in the place you least expect.  But rewarding it will be.  Encourage each other.  Sharon came with me to my first race - the 8k - and I had so much encouragement in words, text and onsite cheering for that 10k.  I finished that 10k.  At the end I said to myself, "I f-ing did it".  It was empowering.  It was hard work and I did it.  I finished and did better than I thought.  You know yourself better than anyone else knows you - and you can still surprise yourself.  

Thanks for reading and thanks for your encouragement.  Don't forget to comment and follow below for an easy way to be notified of new posts.